With the Australian federal election now confirmed for 2 July, 2016, The Public Apology has made the tough but important decision to loosen its exclusively sport-focused editorial policy.

Yes, it gives us great pleasure to announce that a new eight-part series by seasoned TPA reporter, Alasdair McClintock, will commence next week, analysing all the build up to the epic Shorten v Turnbull showdown.

Perhaps it is little more than a desperate bid for extra content to save the ailing website, but that’s ok, isn’t it?

With as little attention to policy and the big issues as possible, McClintock will give weekly reports on where the election is heading and just who is leaning towards being accepted as slightly less of a douchebag come polling day.

Covering such key topics as ‘should we just draw a dick on the ballot paper?’ and ‘which of our prospective Prime Ministers looks more like one of Snow White’s seven dwarves?’, McClintock will remain as restrained as Murdoch’s press when analysing the major parties’ performances leading up to July 2.

If you haven’t already, make sure you bookmark this website today to stay abreast of all the key and non-key politics talking points.

And dick jokes, too. Plenty of ’em. We cannot stress that enough.