June 2011

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Red Bull Racing acted on the advice of its strategic marketing team to “cut ties with a redneck sport” in ending its five year association with NASCAR’s Sprint Cup Series, ThePublicApology can confirm. Red Bull’s decision to leave NASCAR at the end of 2011 as a car owner leaves many unanswered questions. The jury is still…

Read More Red Bull quits NASCAR, waves goodbye to ‘redneck’ market

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The AFL has watered down suggestions the code is inherently racist after yet another on-field allegation. Disgraced Western Bulldogs AFL player Justin Sherman will spend four weeks in the Victorian Football League after admitting to racially abusing an indigenous Gold Coast Suns player Joel Wilkinson last weekend – the pair apparently resolved their differences at…

Read More AFL denies ‘racism’ tag… again

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Gym junkies who dance, whistle and sing to mainstream pop songs while working out will be subject to on-the-spot fines in a new crackdown on anti-social behaviour. The ‘zero tolerance’ state legislation will give gym owners the right to forcibly remove the offending members from their premises. State appointed gym officers will be on the…

Read More Singing gym junkies to be slapped with heavy fines

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ThePublicApology is backing a government nationalisation of all cricket clothes factories, distributors and retailers with the end goal of developing a Standard Practice Cream. Colour-coding inconsistencies have plagued cricket competitions across the globe for decades.  And while this publication is apolitical by nature, this writer urges the federal government to get behind the standardisation of…

Read More TPA backs AusCream scheme

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The Miami Heat is thinking of trading Gloria James to the Boston Celtics in exchange for Flo Allen, in what is looming as the first non-player or non-administrative transaction made in NBA trading history. ThePublicApology understands that Heat officials, desperate for answers after the dramatic series loss to the Dallas Mavericks, mooted the “mom trade”…

Read More Miami in talks with Boston to trade LeBron’s mom for Flo Allen