An elaborate touchdown celebration took an unexpected turn for the worst at the Green Bay and Atlanta clash on Sunday, with Packers’ wide receiver James Jones sustaining career-threatening injuries – not to mention a substantial amount of egg on his face.
After a stunning 70-yard reception that handed the Packers the lead, Jones began dancing around the end zone in order to mock the Falcons’ fans.
But just as he was throwing the ball into the crowd – in attempt to knock over as many Atlanta supporters as possible – a large cracking noise could be heard and Jones fell to the ground writhing in agony. The crowd cheered and then proceeded to throw empty beer bottles and half-eaten hot dogs towards the crippled receiver.
Falcons fan Skip Reid was seated close to the end zone and lobbed a Miller bottle at the stricken Jones. The bottle hit Jones’ helmet, showering him with tiny shards of glass.
“Damn it. Where are all my other empties?” said Reid, after realising he had thrown his only bottle. He later searched the stadium frantically for a makeshift projectile, opting to rip out a seat and hurl it at the offending player.
After the Falcons’ fans had exhausted themselves throwing debris onto the field, Jones was rushed to Grady Memorial Hospital, where his condition was listed as critical and doctors confirmed the worst fears of Cheeseheads.
Emergency room physician Albert Grey said Jones’ playing days are likely numbered. “This is by far the worst touchdown celebration injury I’ve seen in all my years,” he said.
“In addition to the severe spinal injuries sustained during the celebration dance, it also appears he’s been poisoned by some sort of rancid manufactured meat. We will also be in there for many hours removing beer-bottle glass from his torso, buttocks and legs.”
The injury hampered an otherwise successful night for the Packers who easily dispatched of the Falcons 25-14, to move to 5-0 for the season.
Meanwhile, the distasteful incident took the attention away from the real marquee match-up of week 5, that between New England and New York at Foxboro Stadium. The Patriots, after starting slowly, convincingly held off the Jets, 30-21, with Patriots’ quarterback Tom Brady again instrumental in the win.
Brady credited his success to the absence of his Brazilian supermodel wife, Giselle Bundchen, who is holidaying in the Cayman Islands.
“Yeah, it’s better when she’s not here. Thousands of drunken Bostonians leering at her for four hours. Not to mention the constant sexual advances. It’s not cool,” Brady said after the game.
By Nick Gordon