A Forced Post About Football Grand Finals

You know it’s been a while between posts when you realise you’ve forgotten both your admin user name and password.

This website began with such promise. I had assembled a solid crew of eager writers, helmed by yours truly, all of whom had promised to submit countless articles on a regular basis to launch The Public Apology into the public’s consciousness. With the notable exception of Alasdair McClintock – an excellent scribe and founder of the seemingly defunct TPA Guildford Awards – these writers failed to deliver.

As such, it has been a hard slog for someone who, let’s be honest, oscillates between having an mild appreciation for sport to holding no interest in it whatsoever, other than for the hilarious and varied off-field indiscretions that professional athletes tend to commit (the latter action being what this website was originally founded upon).

But it’s grand final week in the AFL – and the Brownlow medal ceremony was held last week – so it would remiss of me to not write something, even an piss of shit article as directionless and poorly proofed as this. And the rugby league finals will follow a week later, with two Sydney teams certain to draw a sell-out crowd full of cashed-up bogans, corporate box-dwelling executives, and people who should otherwise know better than to attend any fixture at ANZ stadium regardless of code.

I’ll keep my eye on these events, sure, but my teams are no longer in either competition. In the AFL, the Swans were unceremoniously bundled out of contention last week against Fremantle – which, even though the Dockers are apparently ‘good’ now, still feels slightly embarrassing. And the less said about my NRL team, the Canberra Raiders, the better. In fact, you should visit this blog to truly understand the inner turmoil of a Raiders fan (read: knowing the direct number for LifeLine off by heart).

Anyway, to those of you cheering on your favourite team this weekend, good luck to you. You’re obviously yet to experience the strange sensation of sporting apathy that has hit me this year, unexpectedly, like a bout of SARS.  For your benefit, I will continue to keep myself mostly isolated, in a negative pressure room, and advise that your apply a face mask while adhering to complete barrier nursing precautions should you choose to come into contact with me.

By Dave Edwards


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