Sydney ‘Jock’ Exposed as Try-Hard at Lame Eastern Suburbs Party

A Sydney man who presented himself as both a die-hard Waratahs fan and a junior rugby prodigy has been exposed as a fraud.

The 29-year-old Double Bay native and boat shoe aficionado was at a mediocre house party last Saturday night, where he openly claimed to be a “huge ‘Tahs fan.”

However, when put on the spot to list three current players in the Waratahs line up, he was only able to come up with “Folau… and is Chris Whittaker still playing?”

The man was also later discovered to have embellished his high-school footballing prowess. Having claimed to have been an integral part of the “Shore 2002 1st XV,” it subsequently emerged that he played mostly 3rd XV rugby and just “one or two games off the bench for the 2s,” according to one party-goer.

“I’m not sure what he was thinking going to a house party in Paddington and lying about who he played for at school,” the source told The Public Apology.

“There were at least four Shore old boys there on Saturday night, mostly from the class of 2004, and they all remembered this guy as a ball hogging inside centre who couldn’t throw a left-to-right spiral pass.”

The unnamed man was later seen drowning his sorrows at The Courthouse in Taylor’s Square while watching the FA Cup final. It is also assumed that he made a terrible sexual decision early on Sunday morning.

By staff writers 

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