Glenn Maxwell batted three in the last test match. He hit a breezy 37 off 28 in the first dig and just 4 in the second – however, he did manage to squeeze a reverse sweep in.
The following quote from Maxwell exemplifies everything that is wrong with the Australian cricket team today, let alone society in general.
“They back me to play that reverse sweep no matter what the situation of the game. They understand for me that it’s no different from a cover drive for any other batter. They have instilled confidence in me to play that shot and they have seen it come off time and again. They accept the fact that for me it’s a normal shot, it’s no different from someone else getting beaten in defence. My best form of defence is attack anyway, so they would much rather me go out playing my natural game than defending and getting caught at bat pad,” Maxwell said.
Excuse me? That’s probably the most arrogant thing I’ve ever read – and I’ve read the Latham Diaries.
The reverse sweep is not like a cover drive. It’s a trick shot employed by kids in the backyard. It has some merit as a surprise tactic, but it is certainly not akin to The Cover Drive – the purest stroke in the game. Bradman would be rolling in his grave at this kind of rhetoric.
I don’t want to go into this in too much detail, but Maxwell is just another Gen Y dickhead who will come and go. They’re as ubiquitous as the iPhones they use, and just as disposable.
Just dig in, mate. You’re probably a decent batsman, otherwise how the hell did you even get a run at state level? Was it all reverse sweeps and ramp shots in the U12 rep team? Seriously, how did you even get in the test team?
I’m no wowser, but when it comes to test cricket, I’m positively Menzian in my respect for tradition.
Robert Menzies was, as you may know, the instigator behind the “Prime Minister’s XI” – the annual tour match held in Canberra at Manuka Oval, where the Australian team is comprised of players picked by the sitting PM.
Menzies would be horrified by what the Australian test side has become. Ditto Hawke, Keating and Howard.
Meanwhile, here’s some more shit from Maxwell.
“On a fourth- and fifth-day wicket you need to put the pressure on the bowlers and get rid of those bat pads. My plan was to try to get rid of those guys as early as possible in my innings and hopefully get into my innings and make it easier to get singles and manipulate the field. Unfortunately it didn’t quite come off.”
No shit it didn’t come off. Jesus, you’re employing the “hit them out of the attack” philosophy? Really? Fuck me you’re a basic human being.
By selecting Maxwell at three, Darren Lehmann and the selectors are basically giving the finger to old school test cricket values such as patience, strategy and technique.
The world is a silly place in 2014. We rely on smartphone apps to hook up sexual partners and upload photos of our food to social media in a bid to garner ‘likes’. Political disengagement has soared to new levels, while the threat of terrorism burns brightly in the background.
Society is fucked, sure. But please, let’s take a little bit better care of our cricket team.
By Dave Edwards