AFL – Page 3 – The Public Apology

April 19, 2012 by edmachine23 0 comments

Brain Injuries Could Lead To Gay Footballer Deluge: Demetriou

The AFL is concerned that latently homosexual players may start using injuries as an excuse to come out of the closet and blemish the code’s impressive record of having, to date, no openly gay footballers. The Public Apology understands that CEO Andrew Demetriou is fearing an avalanche of “closet-hoppers” within the AFL, following news from the UK that a…

February 21, 2012 by edmachine23 0 comments

Music Review: GWS theme song

Not being one to spruik an oft repeated tune, I think this will be sung before round seven and then regularly throughout the year – but then again I’ve been saying the Bombers are premiership certainties the last decade, so what do I know? Penned by Cat Empire member and self-appointed lecher Harry Angus, the…

November 30, 2011 by edmachine23 0 comments

Collingwood takes punt on Moneghetti, de Castella

Collingwood has taken the extreme measure of recruiting aging marathon runners Steve Moneghetti and Robert de Castella in an audacious bid for the 2012 AFL premiership. The Public Apology understands that the middle-aged athletes – who have no prior Australian rules experience – have both been locked into a 23 season contract valued at some…

November 25, 2011 by edmachine23 0 comments

Geelong’s Josh Hunt finds love on the Kokoda

It was billed as the caddish behaviour of a sexually charged footballer, but has quickly emerged as a modern love story. Geelong star Josh Hunt has ditched Ellie Pearson, his girlfriend of five years, for a Queensland girl that he met on a Kokoda Track adventure tour. In an email to work colleagues, Pearson said…

October 4, 2011 by edmachine23 0 comments

Bartel edges out mystery player for Norm Smith medal

Geelong mid-fielder Jimmy Bartel may have scooped the best on ground award at the 2011 AFL grand final, but all the talk post-game has been about an unknown entity known only as ‘The Boys’. Last week The Public Apology polled all 36 starting players on who would take out the coveted Norm Smith medal for…