Equatorial Guinean swimming sensation Eric Moussambani Malonga – affectionately known as Eric “The Eel” – has announced he will return to the pool following Ian Thorpe’s underwhelming return to the world arena. Known primarily for dispelling the myth that black people can’t swim, Malonga contacted The Public Apology from his home in Malabo where he…
Read More Eric “The Eel” in Thorpie-inspired comebackNew York Jet star Bart Scott has divulged the reason behind why he left Baltimore three years ago – in turn explaining the fierce, unlikely rivalry between the Ravens and their neighbours, the Washington Redskins. Speaking on The Michael Kay Show on ESPN radio, Scott elaborated on why the Ravens-Redskins relationship was so acrimonious. “Like…
Read More Stripper shortage behind Ravens-Redskins riftThe real reason has emerged as to why Chicago Bulls legend Michael Jordan cancelled his Australian trip this month – and it has nothing to do with the prolonged NBA lockout. An eye-witness revealed to The Public Apology that he saw the six-time NBA champion being ushered into a VIP room at Las Vegas’s famed…
Read More Jordan shuns Oz trip for high-stakes pokerTeam-mates of New England Patriots’ wide receiver Julian Edelman have revealed that the player has a long history of indecent behaviour, including several past incidents of groping, many of which were directed at his own team-mates. The revelations come following the recent arrest of Edelman for groping a woman in a Boston nightclub during a…
Read More Patriots reveal Edelman’s grope ‘not his first’A Sydney advertising copywriter has been made redundant after he refused to participate in a $5 Melbourne Cup workplace sweep. The 25-year-old man was reportedly approached yesterday afternoon by an obnoxious middle-management type who asked if he would like to “chip in a fiver for the Cup.” However, the copywriter refused to partake in the…
Read More Man fired for not playing Melbourne Cup sweep