What happened to New York City?

What happened to New York City? You know, the New York City that made legends. Where Joe Namath became ‘Broadway Joe’ … where Walt Fraizer became ‘Clyde’, a legend on and off the court.  That same New York City that Frank Sinatra crooned about…

New York, New York… I want to wake up in that city… that doesn’t sleep… and find that I’m king of the hill… top of the heap…

Over the past six weeks, New York City has been taken over by a nerd who plays for the Knicks and a choir boy who the Jets traded for.  Talk about an identity crisis.  Derek Jeter gets busted for giving his one-night stands’ a gift basket on the way out the door, and all of a sudden the supposed “greatest city in the world” is turning into a giant church camp.  Seriously, though, it was only a few years ago that Namath was drunkenly hitting on a sideline reporter during a Monday Night Football game – reminding everyone of the good ‘ole days. And Fraizer does play-by-play for the Knicks.  One look at him and you know he still has his fastball.

Instead, the city that could eat you up and spit you out before you blinked has gone soft.  ‘Broadway Joe’ and Fraizer would not even recognize what it is becoming. No longer are the days when Namath and Fraizer would rub elbows with Miles Davis and Teddy Pendergrass.  The newest Jet quarterback, Tim Tebow, is more likely to be teaching Sunday School to his teammate Antonio Cromartie’s nine illegitimate kids rather than making some of his own.  And the first person to debunk the rumor that Jeremy Lin and Kim Kardashian went on a date was Lin himself … what’s that about???? 

Here are two twenty-something professional athletes who are in bed before ten on a school night.  Lin especially; you know how quickly he could tear through Chinatown? He does not even need to try to use the line, “Hi, I’m Jackie Chan.”  And it isn’t like Tebow is practicing his throwing… you’d think he’d have plenty of time to mop up some of that Yankee tail.

The two virgins could be tearing NYC up

If Mark Sanchez is the closest thing New York City has to a playboy, then you know the city is in trouble.  The Statue of Liberty is just rolling her eyes, wishing she had something fun to entertain her at night.

Here’s a novel idea … Tebow and Lin should have a contest: one month to see who can rack up the highest score.  You have to hit a different borough every night though. Lin will take Chinatown and Harlem but Tebow will have Manhattan and Queens.  Brooklyn will decide it all.  There will be a massive tally board on the screen in Times Square.  GAME ON!!!

By R.J. Karas